This is exactly how I was defined from a young age. I hope everyone who reads this enjoys it as I have enjoyed carrying this with me for so many years, with very fond thought.

In 1978 I was 15 years old, I am now 40 years old but remember this as it happened yesterday. The thought of this first encounter with BDSM and trust still makes me thankful I am who I am.
One evening my entire family and I were sitting outside talking in the early evening and a young man that worked at the local feed store came by our house. I knew him as an aqaintence from going with my dad or bothers to buy feed for our cattle.
He came by and was really friendly and finally asked if he could take me for a ride in his brothers truck. My parents thought it was ok, but we had to be back at midnight. Off we went.
We drove all over my home town, chewing the fat, but what mostly stuck out in my mind that night was all the situationual questions this young man asked. He was very interested in my home life, had my 3 brothers ever picked on me, did I defend myeslf.
He brought me back home at 10:00 p.m. that night, needless to say my parents were greatful, not the least bit the wiser.
The next week he came to my house unannounced before noon and asked if he could take me out for a picnic. My parents said sure, but as before be home before midnight.
We got into his brothers truck and drove to southeastern Oklahoma, never once during this trip did we ever go through a town. (If you have ever been in this state we have more podunk towns than Carter has peanuts.) As we drove along the questions came only this time it was with a little more ease and confidence on his part.
After nearly 2 hours of taking every red dirt road in this state, we arrived at our destination, a house quite hidden from anyone. There was a very big pond, an old barn and a very old house. He walked towards the house, all the windows and panes were still present, the door opened easily.
The receiving room was a bit small, to the right was a set of stairs leading up. The great room was to the left, and then the kitchen; the cabinets were still in place, the cabinet tops were wide and the old floors in the house had tar linolium with a large flower print. The bathroom was off of the kitchen, not in very good shape, an old claw foot tub, mirror and a stool. A small hallway lead back to the receiving room and the dining room. Upstairs was three bedrooms but they were very small and shaped like the roof on top of the house. This old house was amazing, you could feel all the family and hominess even just standing alone there for a minute or two.
Outside we went and laid a blanket on the ground and just sat and talked. It was in June and already if was very hot. My friend suggested a swim but we hadn't brought our bathing suits and *I* knew I wasn't about to get naked in front of anyone! The thought of that scared me, but only because I was so excited. I stand 5'3" tall, I have not grown any since I was 12 years old, however my friend was 6'6" tall and very lean and muscular. As we talked about how hot it was, (and it was hot!) Kurt said I could turn my back and he could get undressed and get into the pond. He assured me it would be alright, after all every kid who grows up in the country skinny dips. He got into the water and swam to the other side of the pond.
Part of my trepidation in this case was I was not an experienced swimmer, and I was afraid I would drowned, I was sure if that happened my parents would be upset.
Kurt called from the water to come in and swim with him, but I didn't want to take my clothes off and I was terrified of that. Well, being the gentleman we was he said he would turn away from me and put his hands over his eyes until I could undress and get in. That didn't sound so bad.
I undressed and made my way into the water, it was cool but not cold.
I finally made it up to my neck quite litterally, it was hard for me to keep from getting into the deeper water and I was afraid to make a fool out of myself by not being at least as deep as Kurt.
This is where our game started.
He moved in front of me and asked me if I trusted him; I told him I thought so. He asked if he could pick me up and take me out just a little deeper into the water, I looked up at him and said I thought it would be alright as long as he didn't let go.
Other than ever seeing my brother's naked as kids, he was the first man I had ever seen. He must have had alot of self control because he didn't have an erection.
I slid into his arms, going deeper into the water, in my ear he promised I would be safe. His voice was so calming because I was so scared; I thought I would drown.
Kurt asked me again if I trusted him with my life, a million things were racing through my head, heart beating so fast I thought it was coming out of my chest! Like a lamb being lead to slaughter I told him yes; he told me he was going to let go of me and that I shouldn't be scared. Yes, the water would go over my head but don't panic, he would be right there and he would make sure nothing would happen to me.
I held my breath, he let go; my body slipped into the dark, murky
pond water. As soon as I had gone under he immediately brought me back up again but this same thing went on for awhile. Each time he would pull me up, a gentle hug in his arms.
I'm not really sure how long we stayed in that pond, but we were really wrinklely.
Kurt said we needed to get out and dry off, we laid there on the blanket naked. I was not ashamed, he was laid beside me looking at me, stroking my back.
There was no kissing, just touches. After sometime we were finally dry. Dressing together seemed so natural, he never had an erection the whole time and I suppoed if he had I would have been raped or worse.
Going back into the house to the kitchen to eat he told me it was his grandmother's house and that she had moved to a nursing care center but he still loved coming here. In the kitchen he picked me up and placed me on the cabinet, our food was a bit soggy but that didn't matter.
Soon after we got in his brother's truck and started our drive home on the back roads, he driving and I sitting on my side of the car.
I wanted him so badly at that point it was driving me crazy. He knew that I am sure. More questions followed, was I scared when he let go of me in the water, was it exciting, would I do whatever he asked me to do. We talked about so many things.
When we arrived at my house it was 8:30 p.m., he walked me to the door and exchanged pleasantries with my family. He told me he would see me again very soon, no kiss, nothing.
Being 15 years old, I just couldn't figure this out! I was sure he would come back and I could only be left to wonder what would happen next!!
I have never told this to anyone in my life, locked up inside me waiting to be shared with others like me.