Ya know, I have a problem with this. I have thought about this, and I have thought about this. I dislike psychology. Its faddish and often arbitrary. I think that so little is actually known about how the brain functions, chemicals etc. that it is no wonder the mind is a terrible thing to taste. Psychology says,” why that person isn’t crazy.” Sociology says,” pbbt……oh……he’s off the beam.” Its 2003, I’d be hard pressed to find a large portion of people who aren’t from dysfunctional families. People either are strong enough to deal with it or they are not. it’s the same line of reasoning for why people from some back grounds commit crimes or do hard core drugs or any other thing and why some do not.
Happiness is a chocolate chip cookie, and anger and unhappiness mean that change needs to occur. They are motivators. Personal motivators. Intrinsic motivation is a beautiful thang. And advertising doesn’t work unless it is creating a little self esteem problem.
Any person who says, “Here have my life, manage my life because its out of control and I can’t deal with it.” is just as equally guilty as the person who says,” Ok. And in return you can be responsible for my happiness---equally arbitrary.” That’s not an exchange of power, that’s shifting responsibility. The person who is not balanced going in is the one that is ready to scream victim at any given point. And has been screaming it for years and will do so again. Not because its sexual but because its manipulating someone else into being responsible and then soaking up the sympathy. The person who is doing the abusing is so out of control that he has to control someone else in order to feel like he has some control over his life. That’s not a man, that’s a child. And they are usually intellectually challenged. That type of relationship exists everywhere.
And that’s not d/s or bdsm, unless I am way off base. I could be. Its happened before.
That’s your run of the mill clown act that is every where.
And this wasn’t meant to attack anyone who has had or is having problems with self esteem, because obviously the actual work had to be done by the individual and is operating from a place of strength not a place of manipulation or shifting responsibility.