I can understand you ideas behind the "what will you do" question is valid, from my own experience and personality is it doesn't even cross my mind to not please my partner. That goes for either vanilla or kink play.

My "of course" was not referring to BDSM, but rather to human nature in general in that we seek out what pleases us. The self respect was alluding to the fact that some Dommes (fortunately a minority) do not put the effort into being worthy of respect but rather demanding respect just because someone identifies as sub. Just as we have identified some who identify as sub for perceived easy sex so the same is true for the other side of the coin. This does not have to do with body weight, measurements etc... this is about the air in which they carry themselves and how they interact with the world around them.

Your saying is very apt someone who has a Domme's personality would give off and air or respect no matter the "costume" or situation, I fully it agree that that comes from the core of their being and not from any clothing.

When reaching out I was addressing the original statement of the lack of male subs and the resulting comment of the lack of communication from the ones who do show up. I was not implying that you should be a latex clad tour guide and school teacher (if you want to, I am game )

I have seen much in the way of good advice and guidance on this forum and it is a wonderful thing to find when you are exploring new feelings that are shunned in public.

I hope you did not see my comments as being negative towards anyone, I was just offering my opinion of what I saw when I first started to explore this lifestyle.

I have a saying too, "opinions are like a$$h0l3s, everyone has one and they all stink".