My role in BDSM is contrary to my everyday life. I'm one of those people who are quite dominant in public life--I've always had professions that demand it, and yet I find submission erotically stimulating. I've often seen it written that this is quite common in sub males because the submissive side, the relinquishing control is an escape. This sounds like a sound theory...except that I have had these feelings from a young age--from before my adult personality was formed. I believe strongly that we are wired the way we are from birth. Your personality can be moulded by your environment, but what turns you on sexually comes from inside. Anyway, my 2 cents.