Happy at last.

[markus_valtion]

A couple of days ago I had my first role play as a sub. It was a blast and I enjoyed it immensely more then I ever hoped for.
I learned a few things from it.

1. that I really enjoy being a sub. In the past I was always a bit confused about what I wanted.

2. that I really like humiliation. Which was a surprise cause I’m usually a very shy person.

3. this one actually caught me of guard. now I like sex. But the problem always has been that it just wasn’t doing it for me. It always felt good but left me empty inside and after it was done I just wanted to be left alone. This time it was just online but I felt completely different. After the role play I laid down on my bed and I noticed that I couldn’t stop smiling. I felt all warm and fuzzy. It was so nice and haven’t slept that good in ages. I guess now I know what I have been missing all these years.


Now I was wondering if there are more people who feel like this. And what makes it so different and so much better?

[denuseri]

I am so happy for you !!

Congratulations and huggels

[symphony]

dunno what makes it different but the same thing happend to me. enjoy!

[satisfied]

Markus I felt the same way about sex for years. It was okay, but there was always something missing. After getting into the lifestyle I felt completely different. I think that being a sub kind of gives us permission to fully let go and mentally go places that we had never let ourselves before because we had our guard up. At least that's what I think for myself anyway. Master is the first person that I have ever let completely inside my head with nothing held back.

[snowflake]

For starters

:rose:Congratulations Markus...!!:rose:

and yes i agree with satisfied.. and the lack of control and letting go allowing another to take us places we dare not go ourselves, or cannot get there on our own such as subspace.. It allows us to open up to things we would never do... i think this helps us fufill those things in which we need to find that satisfaction we so desire...

i also sometimes wonder .. and maybe silly to consider it.. but after humiliation or a good whipping ..if the soft touch of a Dom/me is more wanted or needed and we seem to fall into it more natural and desire it more deeply.. so once it is actually done we tend to find more satisfaction and fufillment from it.. just a thought...

What ever the case hun .. i am so glad you finally found happiness within and the satisfaction and contentment that you so deserve...

just my opinion

hugs
snow

[markus_valtion]

thank you all so much :). its great to see more people feel like that.

[QUOTE=snowflake;812893]
i also sometimes wonder .. and maybe silly to consider it.. but after humiliation or a good whipping ..if the soft touch of a Dom/me is more wanted or needed and we seem to fall into it more natural and desire it more deeply.. so once it is actually done we tend to find more satisfaction and fufillment from it.. just a thought...
/QUOTE]

this is pretty much what i felt. i think the humiliation and pain brake down some of the barriers. and make me able to just enjoy it and now worry for once.

thanks again from the bottom of my heart i really appreciate it.

[snowflake]

at least now i don't feel so silly.. but you are right..Last night Master layed a very hard spanking on me as that is what i need at times...and yes it was again one of the most awesomest times... by the time the sex part started i was too far gone to even think of resistance all i know was i wanted and needed his touch badly..

Two day before Sir did exatctly the same thing ..one of the hardest spankings ever..only it was a severe caning ..and again the need and want of his touch was a must... well you get the drift...

in both cases had either of them walked away without that soft touch .. i would have curled in a ball.. empty.. had they not done the punishment first.. i think with my mood at the time i would have been still very uptight and withdrawn on my reactions..

<<<has been very out of sorts and well totally misbehaving because of it.. even slightly rebellious...if your wondering..lol

just my opinion

hugs
snow

[moco]

I too am learning and discovering in this my new journey. I came here just for some answers to a few questions. but the more i ask my questions the more questions I have to ask. It seems I have a lifetime that has been saved up. I am discovering my dominate tendencies and my secret desires of being a submissive. I have been able to let my dominate side rule with a few submissives who were willing to put there trust into a new member. It is a powerful feeling to have that much trust granted to you. Granted it was virtual and not in person. But the whole experience was real enough for me to see it in my head. I am also exploring my submissive side. Which I have found several traits that I have in common with. I am testing my own boundaries, pushing them seeing how far I can go with out losing my self and yet seeing my potential, I wonder how far I will be able to go. It isnt the destination that I am after right now, just the wonder of the journey that I am on. I feel as if I have just woken up - I guess in a way I have :)

[fluffy]

i started my journey a long time ago, and have only recently found myself in the position to continue it.
im a very capable person and if you told my friends and collegues that i was a sub they would laugh you out the building.
but there is something truely fantastic about handing control to your dom/domme, the 'freedom' is breath taking.
it makes me ridiculously happy.

[stars_and_roses]

But the problem always has been that it just wasn’t doing it for me. It always felt good but left me empty inside and after it was done I just wanted to be left alone. This time it was just online but I felt completely different. After the role play I laid down on my bed and I noticed that I couldn’t stop smiling. I felt all warm and fuzzy. It was so nice and haven’t slept that good in ages. I guess now I know what I have been missing all these years.

Now I was wondering if there are more people who feel like this. And what makes it so different and so much better?

I know exactly what you mean. My bf has never been interested in BDSM, so I started... experimenting with a wonderful and understanding Dom from this site. The first time we played together, it just felt so right and I knew this was what I was missing. Last night, I asked him if he would please consider being my online Master, and he said yes! I think I fell asleep smiling... I'm smiling again just thinking about it...

As for what exactly makes if better, I don't know if I can put it into words. It's just fulfilling the reasons I'm a sub. And it's great.

[markus_valtion]

I wonder how far I will be able to go. It isnt the destination that I am after right now, just the wonder of the journey that I am on. I feel as if I have just woken up - I guess in a way I have :)

thats a beautiful way of putting it. it sure feels like i've just waken up as well. like i just discovered a whole new world. and i'm happy to be able to be on this journey with you.


fluffy: its one of the things i never expected. that giving up controle could be so liberating. its such a wonderful feeling.

stars_and_roses: congratulations i am very happy for you. i hope you and your new master will have a wonderful time together.