Why do many BDSM people look down on switches?
Recently the question was put here whether being a switch makes for a better dom/sub.
I would think so in many cases, because you know a lot about what things feel like on the other side of the fence. But try to pose that question on your average bdsm list, and you are likely to get less than respectful answers..
I myself have pondered these comments:
If you both submit and dominate, then you cannot be really serious/devoted in either.
Or that a Dom or sub is born that way, and that is just the way it is.
Or that doms/subs never ever switch.
Or they get in the way of each other in a practical way.
I would be very interested in hearing what others have to say here, as I myself have some problems with getting things straightened out in my head.
Whatwould the world be if the peas never touched the mashed potatoes?
I think W/we A/all, Dominant, sub, slave, vanilla, liberal, conservative, shrink, etc, etc, etc, wish the world to be a very “clean” place. There is a comfort when things are as W/we wish them to be. Blue is blue. Green is green. And, O/our vegetables never get into O/our meat. Regretfully, the world is not such a place. I personally would not knowingly be Dom to a switch. Not because they have no “right” to be what they wish to be, nor, that it is My place to judge there choices, it is merely the fact that they will not completely be what I wish them to be for as long as I wish them to be that. My world is “cloudy” enough without adding another set of allusions in front of Me. So, it is My preference not to “use” them but not because there is something “wrong” with them. Secondly, I am secure in My Dominance and have no desire to be bottom to A/anyone. It is that same security that allows Me to shrug My shoulders and bless the day that W/we were all created differently and those differences are the spice of life.
Do not be confused. Take your bewilderment as an opportunity to explore life. Perhaps one day you will be One or the other but until that time take what life gives you and live it to the fullest. Worry not what O/others say, nor, how they want to apply their view of how the world should be. If the world was as “pure” as the “purists” wish it were you'd have something to worry about. Luckily, it isn't, and, rather than this “uncleanliness” threatening My personal belief system and personal security it only adds to My self-awareness and values..