When do you walk away from your dom?

You offered him everything you have to share, opened your home & your life to him, gave over not just your body but also your mind. Is it time when you’ve moved on from previous hurts & disappointments, looking towards the future, but now you aren’t sure there is one?

You tried to talk to him – yet again! – about the fact that he has two subs, that he says he wants & likes having two very different subs, but he only ever acknowledges or talks about the one. When he says he understands how it seems & how it makes you feel but doesn’t have any answers for you, can’t explain why he does it, doesn’t do anything to change it – do you leave then?

You tried so hard to be a good sub, did & accepted things so far outside your normal character, all to please him. You stepped outside your comfort zone, trying & even liking new things, aligning with his preferences. You learned from your mistakes & always sought to do better. You shared so many interests & activities, had so much in common from past to present. You offered your time & money to visit him when he wasn’t able to travel to see you – but were always rejected. When do you realize that maybe the failure wasn’t on your part?

It’s been almost a year since you’ve seen him & he still doesn’t know when he’s going to come around. His annual wanderings have become an extended stay at a single destination. When it’s been over a week since you last heard from him – no email, no IMs, no calls – but you read his posts to other people online almost every day, do you call it quits?

When does “submissive” become nothing more than an empty title, just a tag on a FetLife page? At what point do you gather up your pride, realize you’re worth more, that you deserve better, and walk away?