I was wondering if anyone else has had the experience of having people who know you are submissive and taking advantage of you? To me the difference between being used as a submissive desires to be used and being taken advantage of is that the person taking advantage gets what they want and the sub gets nothing out of the situation.

For example:In college I had two dorm mates who figured out early on that I was submissive (which they termed 'needy') and used that to their advantage since I had a very hard time saying no and desired their companionship. They would, say, suggest they needed something from their car in the parking lot (we lived on the 8th floor) and waffle about wanting it but not wanting to go get it knowing that I couldn't help myself offering to go get it. I did a dreadful amount of fetching and carrying for them and felt rather used but unable to articulate this. They had no interest in what I wanted or needed, just that they could get things out of me that they wanted. I suppose you could classify this as a dysfunctional kind of relationship if not quite abusive. Eventually we all went our separate ways but I still have trouble not volunteering for the least little thing my friends want.

So I thought maybe others have had this happen to them and might like to share their experiences and how they handled it if they could.

-selkie