BDSM & Jerry Springer... oy vay

[Pandora's Box]

I was watching Jerry Springer the other day (yeah yeah, hush, it's an occasional guilty pleasure ) and they had a BDSM couple on there. Yes, it was a lot of bullshit hype. But there are a couple of things that got me.

Her "dominant" had filmed her being a puppy girl in the park. Using the term "little bitch" and to go fetch, etc. She said that when she saw the tape of her doing it that she felt utterly degraded and ashamed.

On the tape however, she wasn't having too much problem with it. But in the studio, in front of the audience, she described it as an utterly negative humiliating experience to see that tape.

After seeing her "dom", I could understand why she didn't want to delve as deeply into the lifestyle as he. He was one of those order barking doms. Order now, ask questions never.

We've all seen it before and many of us have experienced it before. I mean you should have seen this dork. He came out in leatherette short shorts, a black netting shirt, a leather collar with 5 O-rings... yes, he was ready for a dungeon fetish party. Before saying anything to her, he charges out on the scene waving her collar and ordering her to put it on.

So of course, this is the image that national TV exposure gave d/s. Or this is the image that these two portrayed. Which that bothers me, but not as much as the core of it. At least the core of it to me.

As a submissive, you do many things that could be considered as "odd", "embarrassing" etc for your dominant. But... in a healthy d/s relationship these acts are mutually reaffirming. Both dom and sub both give and receive.

I guess all this rambling comes down to the fact that she wasn't getting what she needed out of it. I don't think he respected her. I think he was one of these little insecure twits that uses d/s to get laid and to feed his inner kinkster. It was a one way street.

And then, beyond that... this is what millions of people saw as a representation of bdsm.

Don't know if there is a point or order to all this. But apparently it was something I felt the need to express.

Carry on...

[allalone46]

To bad i wasn't home to see a fool and some foolet playing at the D/s life. But what burns me is that everyone thinks that thay are real. What you described son'd to me like two wantabes or a wantabe and female sub that doesn't know better showing just howstupid thay are. and demeening thouse like use in the prosess.

[spike]

In Britain we have had a couple of shows of this general nature closed down after using participants who were fake and either inspired by or not sufficiently vetted by the production company. It sounds to me like this was what was going on here. Bad research, pre-ordained attitude for the audience to pick up, emblematic fetish costume straight out of late-night comedy.

But any kink on television seems to be either bad pay-site style soft porn or journalism with a predetermined conclusion. One of the forums on this site has an advert for a Canadian program inserted by BDSM_Tourguide which may well be an exception to this. I look forward to what the Canadians have to say, but good coverage is rare over here.

Spike

[allalone46]

Jerry Sringer is the norm in the U.S. for the stooped and thefools that will do or say anything on TV and for the fun of it thay get them to fight as well. I just suprised that this, I don't know what to call him for i don't even think he was a wantabe but i am suprised that he did't start betiging her right there on TV for the fools there that would belive he as real.

[mythicat]

You know that show is fake, right? The producers claim that they "try to validate" the guests' story as much as they can; but let's face it, they're just taking the word of people who want their 15 minutes of negative attention. And even if you want to suspend reality completely and believe for a moment that it's all true...you're still never going to see a healthy couple on Jerry Springer. How would you even promote that?? lol

It's fluffy entertainment, take it with a grain of salt.

[allalone46]

I know it is fake but if you ever watch the talking heads describe it thay think that stuff is for real. And one wonders why thay can't get the new reght.

[mythicat]

I honestly don't think they believe it either. I think they're looking for an excuse to get some attention too. It's all about pandering to the ratings gods.

[spike]

How would you even promote that??

In today's show: My husband makes my cocoa every night! My sister paid my college fees but won't let me pay her back!! and My wife and I don't like to talk about sex in front of other people!!!

Spike

[mythicat]

In today's show: My husband makes my cocoa every night!

That is so wrong...those people should be ashamed of themselves!

[allalone46]

Pepole think it is real, and the produsers put that on thinking it is what people want. Oh well.

[mythicat]

Pepole think it is real, and the produsers put that on thinking it is what people want. Oh well.

Some people think it's real. I would reckon that the vast majority don't. But apparently it is what a lot of people want or the show would have been axed long, long ago.

[slavelucy]

That is so wrong...those people should be ashamed of themselves!

ROFL! This really made me laugh.....these twisted fiends, making each other's cocoa *much shaking of head and clicking of tongue*

In terms of Pandora's post, whether or not those people were actors, there's one point which remains the same and which winds me up a bit...and that is the fact that millions of people saw those two as a representation of BDSM...which seriously sucks.

Another point which i liked, was:

I think he was one of these little insecure twits that uses d/s to get laid and to feed his inner kinkster.

Grrr...now, this is seriously one of my personal pet peeves, people who masquerade as dominants in order to get sex or to try and quench a kink that they can't place; BDSM kinda becomes a handy peg for them to hang their coats on...and meanwhile, our reputation, as a group takes yet another blow.

sl

[mythicat]

millions of people saw those two as a representation of BDSM...which seriously sucks.

Those people have oh so many! issues of their own, that I really don't care what they think of me.

people who masquerade as dominants in order to get sex or to try and quench a kink that they can't place

I dunno, I've always found them lots of fun to toy with.... :[

[MrJerseyGuy]

I had to chuckle as I read this because I have Springer on in the background (New season and all). And in thinking about it, I'm probably more embarrassed that I watch Springer everyday than I am about being into bdsm!

I guess one of the advantages of getting a little older is that I couldn't care less about most people's opinion. I think bdsm is one of those things where...either you get it or you don't. If most people don't, that's their loss. I actually get a kick out of it when vanilla friends are over because they have to walk through the bedroom to get to the bathroom. Not once has anyone asked about the big I-bolts sticking out of the walls next to the bed...but you know damn well they noticed! My cleaning girl & her boyfriend have been good friends of my g/f & I for years and she has never said one word about it! (Even though I know she's dying to ask).

Back on topic...as much as I hate to admit that I am one of them...the opinion of your average Springer fan really wouldn't mean much to me one way or the other.

Oh...and for the record, I live in a condo, not a trailer!