BBW Fetish

[strangeguy]

Basically, I am a guy who is really attracted by BBWs (Big Beautiful Women), or obese women if you want to be objective and clinical. I am non-judgmental about the fact that they are fat but I happen to be really interested in and fascinated about female obesity.

Now, it can be argued that obesity is unhealthy and thus this fetish would cause harm but I do want to point out that it's not my fault that somebody is fat to begin with. I am simply not responsible for the fact that somebody else is fat, I am just interested in it.

However, as you might know, obesity tends to be quite private, especially for females, and certain aspects of it is really taboo. Now, I can almost hear somebody think, "no, there are no taboos about obesity" but if you think a little bit about it. Let's say that you see an obese female somewhere, wouldn't it be a little bit taboo to ask her how much she weighs or ask her to fill in a little form telling how many cheeseburgers she have had in her life?

OK, so it's a little bit taboo but I can assure you that there are aspects of obesity that are way more taboo than just the weight in numbers.

Now, most fat people argue that they are fat because of genetics. I don't deny that genetics play a role but I am certain that when it comes to Western countries (and the US in particular), I am deeply convinced that eating habits and sedentary lifestyle are quite important contributions for most cases.

And when you come to this, and start talking about this, then you can really hit taboos, at least that's my experience. Even in the so called fat acceptance movement, almost all people argue that they are fat purely because of genetics. OK, genetics probably impact behavior as well but let's overlook that part because of simplicity.

My theory is that a lot of people get fat because of environment. If you live/grow up in an environment with an abundance of food and easy personal transportation, then it's really so that perfectly normal human weakness (gluttony, physical lazyness) causes a lot of females to get fat, despite the ideal of thinness. And when you ask a female to reveal these weaknesses, when it's done in a formal, polite, clinical way, it seems to cause a form of domination. Somehow, I am able to ask questions that females find very "clinical" and gives them the feeling that she is standing in front of a doctor who is about to lecture her about her weight. No, I never lecture, I am not interested in that.

The people in the so called fat acceptance movement, do not tolerate this little idea of mine. Sure, they tolerate fat, even that somebody is too fat to walk but they don't tolerate this dominant/submissive aspect of asking a female clinical and intimate questions about her obesity.

There are also numerous things you can do besides talking, such as weigh in, taking measurements, inspection of obese body parts, medical exams, etc.

To summarize, the ideal sub would be an overweight or obese female, who has had a little too much food and a little too little exercise in her life.

Edit - this post started off as part of strangeguy's introduction, and I moved it here to facilitate discussion of this fetish. The first few posts below were posted whilst it was still in the intro forum, which is why they may seem a little odd sitting here. cariad

[anonymouse]

Oh, is that all? I thought you were really weird.

Your fetish falls under the umbrella heading of 'humiliation play', in case you didn't already know. As a BDSM activity, provided it's concensual between you and your partner, it's no more a taboo than forced sex fantasies and play or some types of age play.

anonymouse

[angelic.zest]

Hello and Welcome!!!! very interesting fetish!! im a plus size gal and enjoy all my body lol...and thats great someone loves a chick with alittle extra meat on her bones ....

kurixxx

[strangeguy]

Hello and Welcome!!!! very interesting fetish!! im a plus size gal and enjoy all my body lol...and thats great someone loves a chick with alittle extra meat on her bones ....

kurixxx

Hi,

Thanks for the warm welcome. I am glad to see that not all females in this community are rail thin

[strangeguy]

OK, I thought that I would tell about some categories (with examples) of issues that IMHO is pretty taboo when it comes to female obesity. If you start asking an obese female about these, then it's my experience that it will end up being a bit D/s, regardless of how politely, friendly and non-judgmentally you formulate yourself.

For all of these categories, I have found that there is a tendency to underestimate the obesity and it's impact, so you might sometimes need to ask kind of cautious probing questions to get a more honest answer. For example, if you ask the weight, it's possible that the woman weighed herself 6 months ago and she will give you that number despite the fact that she might be well aware of the fact that she has put on some poundage since then.

Here are four broad categories with examples that I can think of right now:

1. Stats. This is not a taboo with everybody but for some females weight and waist measurement are pretty secret stuff. Also, if you ask about uncommon measurements (such as thigh or belly drop), it will make the female feel pretty objectified if she needs to measure herself to tell you the answer.

2. Causes of obesity. I don't have time to write about this today but let's say that I think that it's much more common that obesity is caused by overeating and a sedentary lifestyle than what it is that people are willing to admit that such is the case. Overeating and sedentariness, are often caused by the environment in combination with normal human weaknesses (physical laziness and gluttony) that are taboo.

3. Examination and measuring. All sorts of measuring and inspection/examination of obese body parts. These are the body parts that most BBWs are the least comfortable with, I believe. Even if she is comfortable with them, it will make her feel objectified.

4. Limitations and embarrassing problems caused by obesity. This is especially interesting in super sized females.
- A mild example that some women are a bit embarrassed about is that fat women's thighs tend to rub together, destroying their pants. If you observe BBWs, you can quite often see that their pants are either worn or have holes in the inner thighs.
- Another, stronger taboo is that supersized females often have problems reaching all parts of their bodies. For example, when she is bathing, masturbating, wiping, inserting tampons, etc. There are even special tools for this. Females generally don't want to admit that they have these small problems.
- BBWs might have problems with furniture, such as chairs with armrests.
- BBWs are usually pretty embarrassed if they have destroyed some piece of furniture or a toilet seat with their weight.
- Clothes. Some BBWs have all sorts of interesting issues with clothing.

Here, I remember a couple of flights when I have been seated next to a supersized female on a plane. It has happened twice to me that I have had supersized BBWs next to me. Both had problems to keep obese body parts from flowing into my seat ;-) I believe that both women were embarrassed by it while I was secretly enjoying it.

Actually, I would have wanted to tell both of them that it was OK but how do you tell a BBW that "hey, it's OK if a little bit of your soft blubber comes into my seat, feel free to lift the arm rest"; I am quite a shy guy in person.

[fantassy]

I am reading mixed messages in your posts and would ask you to clarify. Your initial sentence said you are attracted to BBW, but your posts seem to indicate more revulsion than attraction. Do you in fact get turned on by and appreciate BBW while you use the discussion to objectify and humiliate? Or do you find their obesity repellent but and good excuse to verbally abuse and humiliate? If the later, do you use your verbal abuse and humiliation and objectification to encourage BBW to lose weight?

fantassy

[strangeguy]

Your initial sentence said you are attracted to BBW, but your posts seem to indicate more revulsion than attraction.

I am attracted to BBWs. However, I do have an appreciation for certain words, that I personally just find objective but other people might find clinical or repulsive.

I do prefer to say 'obese female' rather than BBW because IMHO, BBW is a kind of euphemism and I do not like euphemisms. If you think about it, Big Beautiful Woman, if you take it word by word, that could mean somebody who is just tall or muscular. Obese is a kind of scientific term, and as an engineer I prefer to use those

I do remember that during the 1990s, there were some feminist author (IIRC, her ideas were otherwise quite worthless) that tried to introduce the acronym BOW (Beautiful Obese Woman) but for some some reason it never caught on

I think that BOW would suit my style better than BBW. Sometimes, I do use BBW, just to not create confusion and mixed messages.

Do you in fact get turned on by and appreciate BBW while you use the discussion to objectify and humiliate?

I think that I do enjoy to objectify a BBW. I have to admit that I am guilty as charged on that

Strange that it might sound but it's not really my goal to humiliate, or if it is my goal, then it's something that I have a hard time admitting to even myself. I am just a guy who is really fascinated and curious about female obesity and all sorts of taboos that surround it. I cannot easily explain it but I am really curious about those questions that I listed. Also, if a woman tells me about those, it gives me a feeling that I know something top-secret and I am somehow more connected to the woman in question.

If I happen to see an attractive super sized woman on the street and she has such a shape that it seems likely that she would have trouble reaching all her body parts, then I cannot help myself from fantasizing about what she is doing to take care of certain practical stuff. Of course, I cannot ask her about it.

I believe that this is similar to a vanilla guy who sees a big breasted lady on the street. He might fantasize about what her breasts look like naked but of course he cannot go the woman and say "Hi sweetie, I am curious about your tits, can you show them for me right here and now".

Or do you find their obesity repellent but and good excuse to verbally abuse and humiliate?

No, I find the obesity to be attractive and really fascinating but how do you ask somebody 101 questions about her obesity without introducing some degree of humiliation and/or dominance?

To be honest, I think I am quite obsessed with female obesity. I think that normally, BBWs tend to be a bit repulsed by somebody being obsessed by that. I guess that big breasted women in a similar way can be troubled by a guy being obsessed with her breasts but I think it's even a bigger problem with obesity because there are all this shame that is connected to it.

If the later, do you use your verbal abuse and humiliation and objectification to encourage BBW to lose weight?

No. I believe that the decision to try to lose weight is a very personal one. Since, I prefer BBWs, I would of course for selfish reasons prefer that she stays pretty fat. However, I don't think that I would like to pressure anybody into any particular decision regarding her body weight. I think I would not do much more than that I would tell the woman that I prefer that she stays fat.

[fantassy]

Thanks for explaining. Another question, if you don't mind, have you ever been able to indulge in your fetish or is this all still in the fantasy stage for you? If you have had a D/S relationship with a BOW, how did the BOW grow as a sub in that relationship?

fantassy

[strangeguy]

Thanks for explaining. Another question, if you don't mind, have you ever been able to indulge in your fetish or is this all still in the fantasy stage for you?

I don't have any offline experience of this fetish.

I have had some on-line experience in talking to BOWs but I am completely new to the BDSM world.

Most BOWs have lost interest pretty soon, probably because they have felt humiliated and because they have not been subs, they probably have not tolerated it. I want to add that it's just within the last few days that I have came to understand that my fetish seems to extremely easily humiliate BOWs. Thus, I have decided to explore this from a BDSM perspective. I want to add that I personally am more interested in the other parts, rather than humiliation. Humiliation seems to be a byproduct caused by taboos and personally I wish that those taboos would not exist.

I have had cam experiences with a couple of women. I think neither of them was really subs. Both agreed to show obese body parts and answer many intimate questions about their obesity. One of them was just very open minded and wanted to explore fat admirers because she was newly obese after lifestyle changes. The other one was interested in female obesity herself and thus quite interested to talk about it.

I have also chatted with some other women but there has been no cam sessions involved. Then, of course I have chatted with a large number of BOWs that has very soon lost interested, probably because of the humiliation, as I mentioned earlier.

If you have had a D/S relationship with a BOW, how did the BOW grow as a sub in that relationship?

I don't think that any of the experiences I have had qualify as it has not been outspoken D/s relationships, or even relationships at all. I am not even sure than anything online qualify as a relationship.

However, I would say that those women who has enjoyed the interactions with me over a longer time; I would guess that over time they have become more accepting of their obese bodies and their lifestyles and less ashamed of it. At least it's the impression that I have gotten. After some time, they started to share the information more easily and seemed to be more at ease with it. This is at least the impression that I got.

How it impacted all those who freaked out at an early stage, I don't know and I am not sure that I want to know

[Ross Martin]

This I find a strange appreciation. I have come to like BBW (and I will call them BBW) because they have bodies that lend themselves to BDSM play plus there is the humiliation issue (If that is also what they are into). I find BBW have bigger breasts for rope work, etc and offer plenty of field for fire when it comes to butt spanking, canning, etc. What I do ask for is a pretty face and a submissive attitude. Most women in real life aren't sticks anyway.

[rowshack]

As a blackman i am all about a big ass and there is nothing like FLESH to eat, feel, smell, bind,and taste. And BBW's have what does it the most to me Confidence.