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  1. #31
    spike
    Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by Duetta
    I enjoyed it immensely!!
    That is untill he after a short break returned in his old rag-tag bathing slippers, taped up in gaffa and whatnot!!!

    A bigger turn-off I've never experienced,
    This guy is seriously cruel. Twisted.

    (Just wanted to apologize for my grammar and possible spelling mistakes to the more sensitive members of this forum, though I speak English quite fluently, I can have trouble putting it on paper... er, or on screen )
    As one of the more sensitive members let me say you did nothing to offend my sensibilities. Although your ex-partner gave you good reason to strike out at anything that might hurt.

    In future, you might consider carrying your own blindfold. For safety.

    Spike

  2. #32
    Seeker of Knowledge
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    Party aftereffects

    When my wife worked emergency, she had a fellow come in walking with open legs, as though galded or too long on a horse. He asked to see a male nurse, or a male doctor, she told him it was just her and Dr. Jane, so if he wanted help...

    After some hemming and hawing, he finally mentioned he had a problem with "leaking".

    Nurse: "Leaking?"

    Guy: "Yeah, you know. When you can't hold your water?"

    Nurse: "Oooh. Incontinence!"

    Guy: "Yah. Anyway my Mis.. my ladyfriend suggested I use one of those things women use for their periods, to absorb the liquid so it doesn't leak through. I, err, I guess she was a little rough on ol' John Thomas the other night."

    Nurse: "And the problem is...."

    Guy: "Well, the leaking kept on, so I put another one in.."

    Nurse, barely restraining a scream, and laughter: "You used a TAMPON?"

    Guy: "Yeah. Now I can't get either one of them out."

    The hospital bill for open-organ surgery was in the $7000 range, plus ongoing medical care for over six weeks.

    His mistress sent him flowers.
    Proud Master of my Sweet Yellow Rose

  3. #33
    coy
    Guest
    I'm sitting here completely slack jawed ... tampons? *shakes her head*

    whew *wipes her eyes* thanks for sharing chksng19

  4. #34
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    And the story is true!

    Quote Originally Posted by coy
    I'm sitting here completely slack jawed ... tampons? *shakes her head*

    whew *wipes her eyes* thanks for sharing chksng19
    The question I have is how the heck he got the *first* one in!

    Every single man I have told the story to reaches a hand, consciously or un-, to their groins. Every single woman who hears the story laughs.

    The "gentler, more sensitive sex" my furry fanny!
    Proud Master of my Sweet Yellow Rose

  5. #35
    e.b.
    Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by chksng19
    Every single man I have told the story to reaches a hand, consciously or un-, to their groins. Every single woman who hears the story laughs.

    The "gentler, more sensitive sex" my furry fanny!
    Maybe I'm just an exception to the rule but your story made me go "ow, ow, ow" and cross my legs. And my body parts get along perfectly nicely with tampons.

    However, regardless of my status as female and as a pain slut, thinking about that poor guy made me shudder. So, see, some of us are still "gentler and more sensitive".

    eb (with apologies for the sloppy grammar, but it's three am here)

  6. #36
    Seeker of Knowledge
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    Quote Originally Posted by e.b.
    Maybe I'm just an exception to the rule but your story made me go "ow, ow, ow" and cross my legs. And my body parts get along perfectly nicely with tampons.

    However, regardless of my status as female and as a pain slut, thinking about that poor guy made me shudder. So, see, some of us are still "gentler and more sensitive".

    eb (with apologies for the sloppy grammar, but it's three am here)
    Grammar is always forgiven at 3 AM. My dear lady has too many years as a nurse not to laugh; she's forgiven.

    Another emergency night, she was cutting the slacks off a guy to prep for emergency surgery after a car crash; she felt this really *large* thing hanging down next to his leg.

    Turned out to be a small salami, taped inside his leg, he later reported, to "impress the girls at the wedding".
    Proud Master of my Sweet Yellow Rose

  7. #37
    Seeker of Knowledge
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    Grammar

    Quote Originally Posted by Duetta

    (snip)

    (Just wanted to apologize for my grammar and possible spelling mistakes to the more sensitive members of this forum, though I speak English quite fluently, I can have trouble putting it on paper... er, or on screen )
    Duetta,
    Your English word usage, grammar, and syntax is head and shoulders (and, if you toss in spelling as well, trunk and legs) better than many folks here who were born speaking the language.
    And welcome!
    Proud Master of my Sweet Yellow Rose

  8. #38
    Flogger
    Guest

    When you know its over?

    It was several years ago, my sub were coming back to the house from an evening of dancing when I restrained her hands behind the headrest and was driving along exposing her. Needless to say I got pulled over by the police. Once he established it was consensual he let us go on our way. I thought the "evening" was over at that point. However, when we got home my sub was nonstop horny. We played for hours.

    Word to the wise though: It could have gone way wrong if the Officer had been less understanding.

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