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  1. #61
    From the Land of Fantasy
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    SE, USA
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    329
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    Well, after (finally!) reading this thread, in my 'catching-up for my long absence', I just wanted to point out 1 thing.

    Actually, there is a lot I want to add, but everyone else has already said it in one form or another.

    Key word here, is IMO: RELATIONSHIP From everything I read that you claimed he said and did, then reading his 'good-bye' to you, this was NOT a relationship. This was a one sided affair (heehee it was an affair after all, you are married!) on your part, and he simply used you as a "dumpster", to fulfill some small part of himself.

    Sounds to me that, he simply got tired of the maintenance. So very glad, honey, that you stuffed his garbage into his own dumpster. Hang in there, toots! Time really will heal this raw wound. And, the more you explore in places like this Forum, the more people you will meet, and someday, be able to find what will fulfill YOU!
    And yes, BDSM makes for very, very strong relationships. It is a lot of work on both sides, but WOW!, worth it in the EXTREME!!!!

  2. #62
    his naughty girl
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    N.C.
    Posts
    768
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hunter
    Hell yah they can. Have you met my ex? That's how I knew it was time to amble on. Nearly every conversation ended with 'don't bust my balls'.

    Tease away darlin I can take it.
    Welcome Hunter!! So glad you decided to drop in (and alone too ) Just teasing you nibbles sug!

    So if my new found balls can be busted, then I guess I'm gonna have to invest in a cup??? Hmmmmm...wonder if they make them in a nice pretty shade of pink...and maybe with little hearts on 'em?? LOL...Nah even I couldn't wear that!!

    Great to have you here Hunter....and did I mention that I think the name you have chosen is sooooooooo sexy!!!!

    ~Ltp~
    learningtopleez

    I could spend my life in this sweet surrender... Aerosmith

    ~ltp~

  3. #63
    his naughty girl
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    N.C.
    Posts
    768
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    Quote Originally Posted by Katmandu
    Well, after (finally!) reading this thread, in my 'catching-up for my long absence', I just wanted to point out 1 thing.

    Actually, there is a lot I want to add, but everyone else has already said it in one form or another.

    Key word here, is IMO: RELATIONSHIP From everything I read that you claimed he said and did, then reading his 'good-bye' to you, this was NOT a relationship. This was a one sided affair (heehee it was an affair after all, you are married!) on your part, and he simply used you as a "dumpster", to fulfill some small part of himself.

    Sounds to me that, he simply got tired of the maintenance. So very glad, honey, that you stuffed his garbage into his own dumpster. Hang in there, toots! Time really will heal this raw wound. And, the more you explore in places like this Forum, the more people you will meet, and someday, be able to find what will fulfill YOU!
    And yes, BDSM makes for very, very strong relationships. It is a lot of work on both sides, but WOW!, worth it in the EXTREME!!!!

    Thank you Katmandu! It is always helpful to read another's opinion! Everyone here has been so helpful!!! So now I need you guys to tell me...WHEN will I stop thinking of him and wanting him!? I know what everyone here has said. I know you are all right! But my heart is not listening! It is telling me to write him. To apologize for being rude to him. For never telling him I love him....is that why it didn't work?? OMG...this is the hardest thing ever to deal with and go through. My heart constantly aches for him. I have written a letter...BUT I have NOT sent it. Oh I want to...but I haven't. I just feel like a part of me is missing. So more advice please...I know I need to just get over it. But it's only been two weeks!

    In your hands now....oh most wonderful family!! Thanks!

    ~Ltp~
    learningtopleez

    I could spend my life in this sweet surrender... Aerosmith

    ~ltp~

  4. #64
    Domination is my gift.
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Canadian
    Posts
    45
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    It will take time.

    It’s not getting over a past love in any way, it does take time, a lot of effort and more often than not a few tears. Hang in there though, you got people here and I’m sure a few guys would love to try and dazzle you too. The hardest part of getting over someone is not contacting them, I’m going to tell you now it’s best not to give in otherwise you will regret it. You must have strength. Believe in yourself. You can do it.

    You got a lot of people here who will help you on the way, so feel free to speak to them when you must. They'll be there for you when you need it.

  5. #65
    Service with a smile
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Alaska...(frozen nibbles :D)
    Posts
    583
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hunter
    Hell yah they can. Have you met my ex? That's how I knew it was time to amble on. Nearly every conversation ended with 'don't bust my balls'.

    Tease away darlin I can take it.
    OMG he posted!

    Quote Originally Posted by learningtopleez
    Welcome Hunter!! So glad you decided to drop in (and alone too ) Just teasing you nibbles sug!

    So if my new found balls can be busted, then I guess I'm gonna have to invest in a cup??? Hmmmmm...wonder if they make them in a nice pretty shade of pink...and maybe with little hearts on 'em?? LOL...Nah even I couldn't wear that!!

    Great to have you here Hunter....and did I mention that I think the name you have chosen is sooooooooo sexy!!!!

    ~Ltp~
    OMG you big flirt!

    lmao...just kidding!....sick him LTP...he needs it....<---snickering

    Ok enough joking for now....LTP I know it hurts still....I would expect it to.....cause not only have you lost an intimate contact but an intimate BDSM contact....and those ties can be so hard to cut because they are just so delicious fun....but he was just no good as a person...keep telling yourself that....read and re-read that rotten goodbye he sent you.....and keep on keeping on!.....if you have to look in the mirror every morning and every night and say, "I did the right thing and I deserve so much better than him"...then do it!.....cause it's true...you're the best, Woman!....don't ever let any anyone tell you any different ....big nuggggggggggssssssssssssssss for ya

    ~~nibbles~~
    "Would someone please take me back to my room?" Henry, The Dream Team
    "Stay out of my psychosis!" Jack, The Dream Team

  6. #66
    So Fucking Banned!
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    West Coast USA
    Posts
    258
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    LTP, you're in a very transitional period. It's not going to be easy.

    Whenever you're feeling weak, perhaps if you ask yourself the following questions it will help:

    ~ If I contact him, will he magically change?
    ~ Will my apology do any good? Would he be gracious and suddenly transform into the man I need?
    ~ Will he suddenly recognize my pain and respect it?
    ~ Do I really miss him or do I miss my hopes for us in the past?
    ~ Am I sincerely sorry or do I just want the past that never existed back?
    ~ Is he healthy for me?

    These are the questions I asked myself when I was in your shoes.

    The answers for me were:
    ~ No he won't change.
    ~ No it won't do any good. No he won't be gracious and no he won't transform.
    ~ Even if he does recognize it, he won't respect it; give it and me the time I need.
    ~ I missed my hopes more than him. For with him, came pain. How could I miss pain? I wanted more for myself.
    ~ No I wasn't sincerely sorry, I just wanted my hopes back.
    ~ No he wasn't healthy for me.

    I suspect your answers would echo mine.

    If they do, then keep plugging away.

    It's not a matter of getting past him, it's a matter of getting through this troubling time in your life.

    And it will pass.

    Like my mother says: In time, this too shall pass.

  7. #67
    Service with a smile
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Alaska...(frozen nibbles :D)
    Posts
    583
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pandora's Box
    LTP, you're in a very transitional period. It's not going to be easy.

    Whenever you're feeling weak, perhaps if you ask yourself the following questions it will help:

    ~ If I contact him, will he magically change?
    ~ Will my apology do any good? Would he be gracious and suddenly transform into the man I need?
    ~ Will he suddenly recognize my pain and respect it?
    ~ Do I really miss him or do I miss my hopes for us in the past?
    ~ Am I sincerely sorry or do I just want the past that never existed back?
    ~ Is he healthy for me?

    ...It's not a matter of getting past him, it's a matter of getting through this troubling time in your life.
    Oh Pandora!....I really like that reply ....Good one!
    ~~nibbles~~
    "Would someone please take me back to my room?" Henry, The Dream Team
    "Stay out of my psychosis!" Jack, The Dream Team

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