ISO Suggestions for Play While Trying to Conceive...

[a_curious_poet]

Greetings A/all...

This is my first post besides my introductory post.

My wife (of 2 years) and I are about to start a family. Therefore, we are trying to conceive a child.

While attempting this task, that means lots of sexual play is ahead.

While I have quite the years of experience with BDSM, my wife is a newbie. As I might introduce a few aspects of BDSM to my wife as we play daily...I was looking for suggestions.

I know there are some creative people on this forum, so ANY type of suggestion is encouraged.

Thank you.

[oneslave4me]

The first year is the fun one. Then they get ugly with surgeries, poking, prodding, drugs, self-administered shots, and generally take all the joy out of conceiving. Though since DH offered up his boys for general surgery and had them swell to the size of grapefruits, he does have my undying love and devotion. He definitely took one for the cause.

Usually the first couple months, just enjoy it. Make sure your stuff gets in the appropriate hole. That's a tough one for us. We like alternative areas for that and/or I just love to watch it. Later we found out the swimmers just aren't there, so we stopped worrying about it.

You can have some fun learning to check her cervical mucus/cervical position. The egg white consistency stuff is the "hey, I'm fertile" sign. Cervical position is where the cervix gets high and open to let the swimmers through. Also, charting her basal body temperature can be fun for a while. www.tcoyf.com has the play by play on all of that.

There's some good scenes you can do if you're the sub and she's the dom since she can be aggressive and "use" you as the sperm donor. Dress as a nurse and take the semen sample vaginally, go praying mantis on you and threaten whatever snuff turns you on after she gets her sample, etc.

I'd lay off the CBT and hot tubs and cut back on smoking if you smoke, but the avoiding tighty whiteys, all caffeine and hot baths are myths. And while the every day, twice a day sex is fun, every other day can be better because it gives the swimmers(and each other) time to recover.

The main thing to remember is it can take a normal couple under 35 one year to conceive, but many conceive in the first 3 months. If it takes more than one year or more than 6 months if the woman is over 35, then you should see a fertility doctor and let the poking and prodding begin.

Have a great time, good luck and baby dust,

EAB

[a_curious_poet]

@EAB

Thanks for the wonderful suggestions and comments. This is a great "welcoming mat" for someone new to this forum.

She is 24 and I'll be 30 in September. We've been together since 2000, but married since 2003.

Within the last few months is when we've been toying around the idea of having a baby.

The suggestions were great. Anyone else have an idea of how to incorporate BDSM play into our multiple sexual experiences every few days?

The nurse idea is cute, I'll have to run that by her.

[oneslave4me]

I thought you were looking more for scene ideas to tie into TTC.

Well, to work it into your playtime, start slowly with your basic toys. Do LOTS of talking. I can tell you from experience as a newbie with an experienced(in fantasy) DH, we screwed up a lot in the beginning. I didn't really understand that BDSM enhances his love for me and gives me power. I thought it was because I was lacking something and he needed it to be turned on by me. Now that I "get it", it's a lot better, but we wasted years and had a lot of hurt feelings that can interfere with playtime still.

Does she look at porn, pics, stories, etc? I also got a lot out of reading books on the topic. They especially helped me to "get it". We have a lot of fun looking at the computer and talking about what we see, either individually or together.

good luck

[a_curious_poet]

Thanks again for the input.

We/we had a little fun tonight actually.

This morning, I sent her an email telling her I wanted her to do a few things when arriving home from work.

She was to strip naked, apply cuffs in the front, apply some old collar we had, gag herself with pair of panties wet from her own juices, lay spread eagle on bed and await my arrival home from work.

It was quite arousing to think about it all night of what I had waiting on me at home. To say the least, we had amazing sex this evening.

[a_curious_poet]

FYI - things seem to be going well. Thanks for everyone's comments and such.

[steve_submits]

There is one small thing that you both need to be aware of--the final product of your play. The wee thing will be very demanding--far more than the most demanding mistress or master you have ever met--of your love, time, attention, energy. This will greatly enhance your overall lives, but will do little to enhance your BDSM playtime. Both of you need to be aware that adjustments will be necessary. For example, it might not be the best idea for mommy to be bound to the bed waiting for her master's arrival once the new Master/Mistress is on the scene. Also, H/She might think it great fun to train both of His/Her new subbies to be able to survive on as little sleep as possible--sleep deprivation might be a great SM experience, but it is not going to do anything for your sex lives. It is really great that you are able to integrate your efforts to have a baby with your BDSM lives, but as the battle-scarred dad of two terrific teenage sons--you should be aware that your lives will change for ever upon His/Her arrival. The best of luck to both of you...and in all seriousness, I just wish my wife and I could do it again....

FYI - things seem to be going well. Thanks for everyone's comments and such.

[oneslave4me]

The best of luck to both of you...and in all seriousness, I just wish my wife and I could do it again....

Have kids or not have kids?

Trust me, we have these conversations from time to time. Especially since we're dropping so much cash in the process($11,000 for IVF#1, $16,000 for IVF#2 coming up). Abstaining during the IVF process put a major crimp in our style and resulted in a lot of disconnection.

But, we've always wanted kids, are great with kids, and we ain't getting any younger at 31/30. So, we'll figure it out. And our bedroom has locks, our toy box locks, and we have a split floor plan.

We'll figure it out. Everyone who has kids does.

Thanks.

[steve_submits]

We had similar problems conceiving and finally turned to adoption. A good international adoption will cost you about the same as IVF #2 and you will be guaranteed a healthy child. We adopted both of ours, and it was the best thing we ever did--and I only wish we were young enough and had the money to adopt a third.

Best of luck and best wishes,
steven

Have kids or not have kids?

Trust me, we have these conversations from time to time. Especially since we're dropping so much cash in the process($11,000 for IVF#1, $16,000 for IVF#2 coming up). Abstaining during the IVF process put a major crimp in our style and resulted in a lot of disconnection.

But, we've always wanted kids, are great with kids, and we ain't getting any younger at 31/30. So, we'll figure it out. And our bedroom has locks, our toy box locks, and we have a split floor plan.

We'll figure it out. Everyone who has kids does.

Thanks.

[a_curious_poet]

Being a teacher, I'm great with children too. Therefore, I know the type or responsibility they bring. Thanks for your insists, Steve.

EAB, best of luck to you as well.