Women Want Men Who Appear To Not Want Them

[thir]

"We like the guys who play hard to get and, nine times out of 10, lead to no good. Tell us something we don’t know. Like how to make us stop. I would like to take these findings and set fire to them. I’m embarrassed for us. Can we just stop being idiotic masochists when it comes to love already?"

http://www.care2.com/causes/womens-r...not-want-them/

Disregarding the fact that 47 American undergraduate students in a flimsy test were taken to speak for womanhood in general:

Is it true that women go for men that do not like them? Or is it a matter of the men playing hard to get making it more interesting?

Do we not value what we have? Is it more fun if others want it too?

Or do we really like the ones who like us?

Are men any different?

[denuseri]

Is it true that women go for men that do not like them?

No not nessesarally, but as social animals we do have a tendency to want to be liked, which can lead to this assumption sometimes.

Or is it a matter of the men playing hard to get making it more interesting?

The age old adage is that people always strive most for that thing they cant have and a common tactic by both sides to maintain intrest is to fain a lack of interest one's self...to an extent.

Do we not value what we have?

A lot of people seem to take what they have for granted until they no longer have it. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

Is it more fun if others want it too?

Sometimes it can be.

Or do we really like the ones who like us?

I don't believe an "eaither / or " statement to be aplicable in this case.

Are men any different?

According to the science of medicine they are different not only in their gross anatomy, but on the cellular metabolic level as well. It is no wonder then that their brain chemistry and hence phycological disposition and the inhierent behavioral responces that come with it, is also not quite the same as that of the fairer sex.

[thir]

Is it true that women go for men that do not like them?

No not nessesarally, but as social animals we do have a tendency to want to be liked, which can lead to this assumption sometimes.

It seems logical that if we need people to like us, we choose partners who do?
But this article claims that we choose people who do not like us, so something else must come into play here. If they are right. And what on earth is that??

Or is it a matter of the men playing hard to get making it more interesting?

The age old adage is that people always strive most for that thing they cant have and a common tactic by both sides to maintain intrest is to fain a lack of interest one's self...to an extent.

So it seems in some cases, and I wonder why? Why, if this is true, do we want what we can't have? I mean, in the sense of wanting it because we cannot have it? We are so used to thinking like that and finding it more or less natural, but isn't it really rather weird?

Do we not value what we have?

A lot of people seem to take what they have for granted until they no longer have it. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

I was also thinking, if feelings cool or persons are taken for granted, can this change if someone else wants what we have? Do we value it more?
Or is the safety and warmth of having a good relationship what counts?

[denuseri]

All of the above features I might mention are quite common in the majority of primates from great apes to tree top dwelling monky bands.

There are a number of unconscious desicions taking place within the context of the dominance heirarchy that profoundly influence one's reactions and attractions...so the "that" is for the most part the thing motivating such responces.

Wanting something else, something new, seeking the next thing, are strong base evolutionary inborn instinctual desires of all animals...humans included. We wouldnt ever explore or seek out knowledge of our suroundings beyond what lay directly before us if we didnt do this first. Its all part of our normally functioning brain chemistry. Its not in the slightest way wierd once one accepts who and what is for who and what one is.

Of course one reacts to protect or keep what one has obtained dominion over. Again its part of the hardwireing of our brains. Watch children play with one another when they are not aware that they are being observed and you will see the them acting in exactly such a fashion, and if they come to blows etc with each other and are reprimanded they often give as their excuse for their actions a befuddled look and say I dont know, or a its mine she cant play with it etc.

Without such drive inheriently woven within our tapestry in our phisiology we wouldnt be capable of surviving successfully enough to enjoy any of the other comforts you mention.