Hmmm...unfortunately (or perhaps, fortunately, for me!) i do not share your problem. i am 100% sure that it is a common problem though! So don't think you are a freak or something. i love hot wax play. i've always used the small votive size candles. not the tealights...but the next size up. they are easier to handle and build up more hot wax than taper candles. i've never thought of my pain tolerance as being all that high, but i've never felt any pain at all while playing with hot wax. Even pouring it directly onto my nipples and clit doesn't hurt. It is EXTREMELY erotic and gets me all fired up (no pun intended) in no time flat!

Perhaps you are dripping the wax too close to your skin? i believe the suggested distance is at least 18 inches away from the contact area. If your pain tolerance for the wax isn't that high...try lifting the candle up higher and higher until you find a distance that works for you.

Also...the type of candle you use could factor in. i know you said you use regular unscented taper candles. That is good! But are they paraffin? Paraffin is definitely the safest wax to use. Also, some candles can have hidden additives in them that could cause, not only the melting point to rise, but allergic reactions as well. Are you fair skinned? Hot wax is definitely more sensitive on fair skinned individuals.

I don't know what to tell you about the muscle spasms...i've never had this problem. Hopefully someone else will come along with some better advice, but from my experiences with hot wax...i would definitely try increasing the distance between the candle and your skin.

Good luck!!!