The whole point is not trust of your partner ---when having fun it is possible to get carried away ---not intentionally ---but it does happen ---

I was talking to some one realitively new to the lifestyle ---she and her Dom were both new ---and she told me of a spanking she took while gagged ---I was horrified to say the least ---for one gags are for more experienced people in the lifestyle ---how can you utter a safe word if you are gagged?

now this was not a normal spanking with the hand --and even if it was the gag was not really a good idea ---for newbies----

Safe word are for a purpose ---one to help the Dom know when he or she is crossing the line of enjoyment to real pain that is too much for the sub.

the second reason is for the sub --to gain trust in the dom---that there is a safety net---that the Dom will stop the moment the safe word is used

And that I have found is a problem with newbies ----the see a few pictures or read a few stories about the lifestyle ----not knowing what they are seeing or reading is experienced people in the lifestyle ---and decide to try it, without the saftey net.

Let me tell you there have been more injuries ---and people completely turned off from the lifestyle --but doing this

A gag is an advanced feature in the lifestyle when coupled with pain inflection. Or being tied in a painful position. I advise newbies not to use a gag until they gain experience and maybe a safe sign----Still it is hard to use a safe sign if you are bound while being spanked or flogged ---or hung up bound and gagged

I tend to use a gag only in simulated Noncon sex---where the partner is completely aware of what is going on---and what is coming---maybe tied in a comfortable position and it is part of fantasy play ---not inflecting pain.

I have nerver and will never us a gag on a sub while spanking or caning them --beside their screams are part of the fantasy and knowing they do have a choice if I do get carried away in my part of the fantasy --is reassuring to me.

Thats my two cents worth