Quote Originally Posted by enza
Hello.....I am new not only to BDSM Library but also to BDSM and I hope I can learn something from some of you. I had joined another online group and the FEMDOMS were so cruel to newbies. We have to start somewhere. I was not born knowing this and I have been a caregiver and nurturer for 40 years. To be a DOM is a struggle for me.
I have been divorced for a while and I started dating a man (a high school teacher, scary huh?) that works on the same campus as I do.
To know him in a professional way, you would never imagine that he is into bondage. After dating for a while and finding out that we are very compatible I started noticing he was making hints about tieing him up and having my way with him....so one day I surprised him with chains and later he brought over cuffs. Then he talked about a collar and other things. I'm slow, but I finally realized he was hinting at domination and degradation. Well, now I am at a stand still because I do not know how to proceed. I really feel very inadequate and like I am not delivering what he really wants. Mainly because I have NO imagination and no personal techniques and I really want to learn I just don't know where to go.

Hello enza and a big welcome to you. I am sorry to hear about your bad experience elsewhere, and feel condifent you will find this place very different. There are people here with all levels of experience, from just being vaguely interested to a lifetime of hands on, but even those with oodles of experience remember when they were newbies.

I echo everything which silke said, and just add, that although there is lots of information both here and on other sites, the key is finding out what is right for you (singular), right for him, and right for your relationship. Your answers will be unique to your relationship.

cariad

p.s. I notice you have not yet completed your registration here. You should have had an automated email giving you a link to click on to complete your registration. If you have not had it, or are experiencing problems, please write to Rabbit1 - admin.bdsm@gmail.com