geez, I start a thread and then disappear for a couple weeks. Oops!

Thanks for all the advice, much appreciated. I know that even if I can't get this to work I'm not a wimp That was written a bit more tongue in cheek than it came out. Hell, I was jumping of 25 foot cliffs a coupel days ago and have bite mark bruises on my stomach. I am not a wimp!
Just frustrated because the guy I played with really liked playing with candles and I just freak out.
It's become less of an immediate issue now, he's started dating someone and I've lost him as a Dom (separate topic, but I'm pretty bummed out about that one)

I knew that more distance=cooler wax, but I think my idea of more distance was smalled than what's been said here. I tend to sacrifice distance to improve aim. need to work on that.
And I'll see about paraffin candles. Even though I'm lacking in anyone to play with I think I'm going to pursue some independant wax play. A project, shall we say. Maybe I'll end up with some photos for my trouble.