I know I have. I used to feel guilty, dirty even after doing somthing associated with BDSM. I would think that it was God kicking in my conscience. I dont think it was though. In reality I believe that it was my mother's "voice" telling me that what I was feeling and doing was wrong. I've read through my bible and I cannot find anything that relates to BDSM as being wrong. I've prayed and never felt as though I recieved an answer that says "yes it is!".

Why would I have been created with BOTH parts of who I am, if they were not both right? I've known I was "different" since childhood. My parents always kept me away from anything "sexual, dirty or perverted" while growing up. So it wasn't nurture that was behind me enjoying getting spanked, or having pain turn me on. It's there as much as having blue eyes is there. It's just who I am.

Once I came to terms with that, I've felt a lot more at ease between my faith and my submission. I still get the niggling doubt in the back of my mind, but that I associate to my mother's nagging. She's the only one whos said straight out (to me) that alternative lifestyles were "sick and wrong"