This is something I have been wondering about, and indeed for me it goes deeper, to trying to work out where my own personal submission stops. I have more or less reached the conclusion that I am personally - this is all just me, not proposing anyone else should be the same - middle of the road-ish, about everything. Basically, I believe in independence, mutual respect and tolerance. I am submissive and I do not see submission - a personal choice, and within my limits - as contradictory to feminism.

I believe that women are still quite often not respected and treated as equals within the workplace, or at home: where they are capable of providing an equal service, they should be treated equally. Where they are capable of better, they should be respected as such. Where they are less capable, they should be able to accept it.

Given that I appreciate the freedoms that I have as a woman in a 'liberated' society, I dislike the strongly feminist attitude, the ultra PC, the 'there's no difference' or, even, the 'wimmin are superior' attitudes.

That is where my middle of the road-ness comes in: I cannot approve of any set of beliefs taken to the extent where they lose tolerance, flexibility, acceptance of other's differences, and become demands for total compliance. I take the same attitude on politics; hard liner-veganism (come on : eating honey does NOT exploit the bees!); religion (I have my spirituality and beliefs; I honour other's beliefs; but I cannot comprehend the need to belong to a church or any body of faith that, again, wishes to dictate my behaviour: I don't try to dictate theirs); anything else that tends towards the fanatic/totalitarian.

The same goes for the lifestyle: total submission (slavedom in its most 'pure' form) does seem for me to be the antithesis of liberation and individuality, which I hold dear. But providing the individual (woman, in this instance, but men too) is happy and making a choice to be that way, then surely they are entirely living by feminist statutes: this choice has not been imposed upon them by society, they have arrived at it through their own free will.

Lot of words. I stress again, this is my opinion, my attitude to life: others differ, vive la différence.