I was 19 when I started dating a man who was 42. Neither of us were intentionally seeking for someone of a different age (we were both trying to find someone interested in a long-term BDSM relationship), but we clicked and we both felt we owed it to ourselves to give it a shot. I have to admit, his age terrified me, but I'm all for trying anything once and this was no exception. Neither of us ever imagined the relationship could have succeeded, but, now, more than five years later, we're still together and will be getting married in August.

At times, his age still does terrify me. Twenty-three years is a pretty big difference. And I have to face that, unless I die at an unexpectedly young age, it is highly likely that he'll die twenty-plus years before I do. I'm not saying that to be morbid, just to be realistic.

That's pretty much what went through my head when we started dating. A lot about death. A lot of questions about whether he and I wanted the same things for our future - marriage, kids, a house in the suburbs, etc. I wondered about how my family and friends would react. And I did question if I saw him as a father figure and if I was looking for someone to repair the damage my father did to me. I don't think that was the case, but it really skeeved me out at first when I realized he was only a few years younger than my father.

Drake, no matter how much thought you give this, you'll probably never know for sure where this could go, unless you give her a chance. Despite all the thinking I did, I felt this much older man was worth the risk. No, he's not the man I originally envisioned being with for the rest of my life, but, now, I can't see my life without him. You never know what can happen.

Sorry for babbling,
acissej