The missionary position, which I think is what you are talking about, is no more 'normal' than any other position- and quite a bit less normal than some. So if I were you I wouldn't get hung up on that position.

Allow me to offer you some advice, however, that is universal for either male or female dominants; the orgasm- or lack thereof, is totally immaterial to the pleasure of the dominant. A good dominant, regardless of gender, uses their submissive for their own pleasure. This is how most submissives want it.

The second bit of advice I want to give you was a technique told to me by a domme friend. I am not sure if it is applicable for you but if nothing else you might find it intriguing. While having sex with her submissive she imagined she was the one who had the penis and he the vagina. So in her mind she was the one doing all the thrusting and such

I am not sure if that might help, but she seemed pretty happy with it.

Drake.