Many thanks to all who have had their say in this matter. It has meant a lot to me. After thinking things were OK, it turns out we are still facing this dilemma, now in a philosophical way.

He still wishes for me to go out and 'get' someone. I don't get it, for 2 reasons:

First, what was said earlier about a Dom wanting his sub to go out on her own, pick up somebody....this totally smacks of being 'out of control' for the Dom. Why would anyone who maintains total control over another...want to give that other complete control of herself? It kind of feels like an earlier thread by BDSM Tourguide, about--what's the point in giving a sub their own sub? Why would a Dom want their sub to be out of His control, possibly making errors in judgement, possibly being in danger (through both physical and disease harm)?

Secondly, the psychology of it all is quite disturbing. Does this mean he truly isn't/ doesn't want to be a Dom? Is this what ya'll meant about him simply wanting to be a Masochist, or submissive himself? How does one go about making someone (supposedly Dominant) realize they should Switch, and explore the possibilities he might prefer the 'other side'? I am truly uncomfortable submitting to one who wishes to be only in this for just sex. I thought BDSM was more than that. I thought it was about 'control'.

If he were willing to control the situation, to truly wish to own me, then I see no problem servicing his 'chosen' others, as Masterkurt did to his beloved, now lost Caroline. But to be made to control myself, to go whoring around just to tell him stories....I don't get it. This is not, in my opinion, a good BDSM relationship. Am I wrong here? Am I missing his point? Should I stop questioning?

I really am lost on this subject. It doesn't feel right to me, either to be told to do this, or to question him." Damned if I do, damned if I don't! "