Dear Kinky Lola,
I suggest you try this out by role-playing with a trusted boyfriend. The crucial element is to make sure it's role-play on the part of the partner, too.
As a lawyer, I've represented genuine rapists from time to time. Trust me, a good boyfriend role-playing can make your experience much more dramatic, much closer to your desired fantasy, than real felons would. Real felons have too little sense of the dramatic, and would not take the care to fully understand details of your fantasy which you might consider important.
Your writing on this forum has helped you put the fantasy into words. Now you are better equipped to express your desires to someone who deserves your trust.
Rock