
Originally Posted by
jaeangel
For me, the best part, the most important part, is love/caring, trust, and responsibility. The fact that a Master/Mistress/Dominant feels confident enough to take on the awesome responsibility of caring for another person, and the submissive has that much trust in the person they're submitting to, is the most important part. Trust and responsibility are such fragile things, so hard to find these days and so easily broken that to find anyone willing to take on those responsibilities and carry them out is a wonderful thing.
This to me, is the important part. I was in a relationship where all the other things mentioned were used; humiliation, discipline of both kinds, bondage, pain...but there was no respect in that relationship, so it wasn't a true BDSM relationship. There was no respect, trust, care, or responsibility on the part of the dom in that relationship, so it was mostly empty of meaning for me.
You can have all the other trappings of the BDSM lifestyle, and have it not mean anything. The relationship REQUIRES the three elements above or it's not a real relationship.
Then again, it's just my opinion...