I boil this argument into two camps:

The fantasy where a Dominant has total domination and superiority
to every submissive encountered, regardless of said submissive's
experience and background,

or

the reality where relationships require all people to exchange ideas of what they want to mutual benefit,
i.e., for submissives, the tip of the iceberg is, you torture me in entertaining ways,
and I'll let you torture me in entertaining ways.

You have other choices and aspects as you care to define them, but let's face it-- that's what in play here. Dominant is law, or submissive has her rights, too. Dominance requires respect; respect requires understanding. Having a slave merely requires putting someone in a situation where they are dependant on you for life and shelter. Having a submissive requires understanding that dominance is a gift given, just as submission is.

The submissives involved in this thread seem to have a very clear understanding of the difference between fantasy and reality. I'm not applauding their use of common sense, just acknowledging it. See... they wish to share in a fulfilling relationship with someone who has the same understanding of them, their needs, and their role to a dominant-- their need to submit, to be used, and also to be cared for, to interact. While it's fun for some to play furniture, being furniture is another matter entirely... sitting idly and waiting for a moment to be.

If you can't understand the balance between a submissive and a dominant and that it exists for more than simply servicing the dominant, then you're missing the point of that realtionship. And most relationships.

That's my two cents. Spend 'em as you will.