ok . . . I also like to mess around on sailboats. I have all the equipment, can speak the language, have the skills and the experience. . . . . does that affect my bdsm "lifestyle." I spend a considerable amount of my free time doing this. I have lots of friends who enjoy this also. BUT I don't use it to define myself just as I don't use my bdsm interests to define me. In fact, I like to think I defy being defined. YEAH. . . Thats the ticket. . . . I am beyond definition. I am just to complex to be defined. . . YEAH!!!!