Quote Originally Posted by cariad View Post
I think I would have run a mile if I read some of the things which I read on this site in my early days. There are some of the more extreme elements which I now embrace and some which I don't think I ever will, and have no wish to either. That does not bother me now, but that is with the confidence of knowing that is okay just to pick out what is right for us.

To my mind it must be much easier for a "D" to introduce a "s" to the lifestyle than the other way round - almost by definition. I had been immediately hooked on my D's dominant personality, so I guess he had a head start; but he just introduced tiny things at a time, over months rather than weeks. His real skill was to keep me wanting a bit more each time. It was a good 6 months before he showed me anything resembling this site and asked me to give him my reactions.

cariad
I have to agree. When I first hinted at the topic of BDSM all I could get out of him is "it's wierd, why would anyone want to be tied up?" I'm also young and just starting to discover everything. So we started off slow. In the real world I am a dominant person, but as many of you know that doesn't necessarily follow into the BDSM. Indeed, I'm a submissive. We started off with very simple things, I would get him to tip my chin, to hold my arms behind my back. That sort of thing, I didn't really let on my true feelings until I had gotten him used to it. I can't stand stories that jump from just having decided to be a sub to extreme stuff. It's daft, it just doesn't happen like that. My partner prefers vanilla stuff, and it's been tricky getting him to a point where he satisfies me. But I did get there, and there are some things he quite enjoys. Whether or not it works I think depends on how willing the other person is to act. At first it was very difficult and embarrassing for him to dominate me. But thankfully it's passed, it took a year, but it's worth it.

I think that perhaps getting a reluctant sub might work with the website, but I am not so sure if it would have worked in this situation. For me, Slow and Steady won the race.