Excellent advice ceegee, I am wondering though how others feel about someone who attends who has a vanilla partner.

Unless I have dumb luck, I was going to attend one of the local munches in my area.
When I was first learning about my submissive nature, I befriended a few subs on another site. The only way to attend a munch here is to have another member invite and vouch for you.
The other subs were going to help me get into a munch, but found out that I had a vanilla b/f who was not yet aware of my interests and was not at all interested in the lifestyle.

I had no interest in meeting others to play or meet any potential Doms, but I was abruptly labeled a wannabe and a cheater.
I was told that I was not welcome in thier group unless I was fully into this lifestyle.
Maybe because I felt that at first my own personal life was not anyone's business, and asked a lot of questions that led them to believe that I was ready to embrace and practice BDSM, with others.

I thought that they were a little hasty with thier decision, but then again maybe I got the wrong impression as to what a munch really was.