Quote Originally Posted by TomOfSweden View Post
Why don't you ask her? Does she know what she wants? Or is it just a vague feeling she has. If it is, then this might not really be her problem with you. The real problem may be much deeper.

But to go back to the original question. In my opinion being dominant is about bravery. Not being afraid to stick out and state your opinion. Not being afraid of failing. Not being afraid to listen to and take seriously opinions that might go against yours. Basically, being a good leader. The sex should follow quite naturaly from this.
A very succinct way of putting it. That level of bravery requires a lot of confidence. It does take time to develop that confidence. At least I hope it does since I'm still working on it. TomOfSweden rightly points out that is important to first establish that she really understands what she wants. If you are both clear on this then your confidence in your actions derives from knowing that she wants you to do it.