I was hoping to find some people into a similar lifestyle as my wife and I are. We are not a typical Dom/sub couple. I have been chaste for most of the 19 years we have been married. Not with a device, but just by holding back my orgasims. We call it "being good." My wife loves it. Less from a kinky perspective and more from a point of view that it is something that makes our relationship stronger. I am always very affectionate and loving. However, I would not say she is dominate. I love giving her orgasims. We have a great sex life and I give her orgasims a variety of ways, including penetration. I am always very careful to withdraw before orgasim. I had an accident a number of years ago, but since then I have only had the occasional wet dream. By holding back I feel it make me closer to my wife and really allows me to focus on her pleasure. She sys it makes her excited to know how dificult it is for me to always hold back I believe it is a constant demonstration of my commitment to her. There are periods where is is very difficult to remain good, but overall I would not want it otherwise. In fact, the more dificult it is the more committed to it we are.