A few years ago my brother and his girlfriend(now his wife) were sharing an apartment with me. His girlfriend was my best friends little sister so I knew the family quite well.

One saturday morning her parents call and tell me they're going to stop by for a visit in about an hour. Now normally this wouldn't be a problem as they are both morning people-but they went out the night before, got wasted, and humped like rabbits all night. I thought I was in a cheap hotel all night. Now since the music in their bedroom was playing I knew they were too busy(again) to take a phone call, so I gave them a few minutes-like 45 or 50 before I yelled through their that her parents were stopping by.

The stereo soon turned off and the sounds of frenzied dressing could be heard and this was about the time the door bell rang. I greeted her parents and invited them in, and noticed they had brought their schnauzer Muppet, with them. I made polite chit chat for a few minutes while the two love birds got dressed and came out. They looked a little rough and quipped "We didn't sleep too well last night", to which I couldn't help but roll my eyes.

About this time, Muppet is in their bedroom barking, so everyone looks towards the bedroom door. And at this exact moment Muppet comes charging out victoriously with his new toy. A foot long floppy rubber dong he's holding right in the middle so its flapping up & down in time with his bobbing little run. This is when I snort a mouthful of orange juice right out my nose(fresh squeezed too, damn pulp...).

To make matters worse, when they tried to retrieve the dong, Muppet thought it was play time and refused to be caught. Those little schnauzers are quick. I laughed until I could hardly breath watching those two chase that dong bearing little dog around our apartment.

Her parents, being rather devout christians were of course mortified.

I've gotten to make hundreds of jokes about that incident over the years, and I still give them the same anniversary gift every year-a package of doggie treats called "Snausages".