I'm somewhat ambivalent about this one. I enjoy getting to do a lot of talking/discussing/negotiating in general for the relationship's upkeep and think that discussing fantasies, interests, etc. is very important. I also agree that the time relaxing after a scene can provide a good atmosphere for discussion of preferences...what each person liked or didn't like, how they could better please the other, etc.

As far as actually starting a scene though, I don't think I'd feel comfortable doing that as a sub. Subtle hints or a submissively worded question can do a lot IMO to let a dom know the interest is there on the part of the sub, which is probably nice for the dom as I suppose we can't expect them to read our minds. I kind-of like some of nibbles' examples...just little ways to let the other know without being too blatant, which would probably cause many of us to feel like "pushy" subs.

I don't know how much of that makes sense...it's kinda stream-of-consciousness thinking, but thought I'd throw my two cents into the pot.

eb