Quote Originally Posted by chksng19
snip…
A need to think for a bit, and perhaps to find something to do, arose in him. He went into the huge swimming area, found a spot in the hot tub, and settled back with a soda to think about the upcoming voyage, and who'd want to come along besides Ruby.
Jade watched as Lord Chuck left the cafeteria. She had wanted to speak to him about the going on the cruise but he had distracted her talking about BabySub and Yuri. Now her mind was filled with questions regarding her own feelings. Why did this man always want her to try and understand herself, she had a hard enough time trying to understand others in the dungeon. Jade sat and ate. Maybe Lord Chuck was right. Maybe she needed some time alone to think about how she really felt. Was she truly acting jealous and selfish. It hurt to hear Lord Chuck say so and she felt the tears in her eyes. She was starting to care so much for everyone and it hurt to think that they saw her like that. Jade cleaned her dishes up and went to see Dee about assisting with the dogs.

Dee looked to find Jade standing there on the verge of tears. What had happened to cause such a reaction in her. Jade looked lose and confused.

”Jade are you hurt or sick”, asked Dee.

“No Dee. I am fine. I just came to see if I could help with the dogs”, said Jade forcing her voice not to shake when she answered.

Jade desperately needed to get outside. She felt like she was suffocating and needed fresh air in her lungs. Jade wanted for Dee’s response and when Dee nodded her agreement Jade ran from the room.

Dee watched the fleeing girl. She could almost feel Jade’s pain as she left. Dee wondered if she should have let Jade outside in her condition. It was so strange to see Jade in such a panicked state. For a brief moment Dee thought that Jade may run away, but decided that she would trust Jade. Jade had to deal with some issues and it was obvious she wanted to be alone to do it.

Jade stood outside gulping the air as if her life depended on it when she finally felt like she could breath she walked to the kennel. Jade was greeted by yapping of a multitude of happy pugs.

”Did you miss me my beauties”, Jade said as she reached down to cuddle and caress them.

Jade grabbed the broom and started sweeping the kennel. She smiled as the pugs played and tumbled under her feet. Their antics soon had her laughing.

”Thank you little ones. I needed to smile”, Jade said as she heaped praise on the little pugs.

Jade continued to clean the kennel as the pugs played under her feet. She was calm now and could try and figure out why Lord Chuck’s words had trigger such a violent reaction in her. She had made up her mind that she wanted to go on the cruise but she was unsure now. The taught of being trapped on a boat and acting like a baby was more than she could stand. She didn’t want anyone to see her acting like this. It was extremely embarrassing. She had to laugh. It was a damn good reason to chicken out and not go on the cruise too. So you are trying to figure out an excuse for not facing your training she thought. She trusted and respected Lord Chuck. He had done many things to make her feel loved and safe. She remembered his visit to her room and her whole body trembled and grew hot. She was embarrassed that he could make her so hot from just a memory. Jade knew she was trying to hide from herself and her needs. She had learned so much about herself in such a short time. If she turned tail and ran now she would always wonder what if. Jade finished cleaning the kennel and feeding the dogs. She went back inside the dungeon remembering to lock the door. Jade stopped by Lord Chuck’s office and left him a note on his.

Sir Chuck,
I would be honored if you would consider taking me with you on the cruise. I will work hard. Sincerely, Jade

Jade went to her quarters and started to pack with trembling hands. Constantly repeating to herself. No guts, no glory.