Praise, Comments, or Suggestions for the New Lord Mobius's Dungeon

[chromedome11]

If I've changed some vital bit of info, misspelled a word or two, just tell me and I'll do my best to correct it ASAP.

Great job Ruby. I know it's impossible to edit something you've read several times. Here's the advantage of fresh eyes:

Lord Sir Chuck, last paragraph: "mental powers from a sharing more than a kiss". First "a" should be deleted.

Darkgirl, last paragraph: "tame her is to brake her". Should be "break".

Jade, history: "Her husband beat and rapes". Should be "raped".
Jade, history: "There divorce occurs when he runs". Should be "Their divorce occurs after..."
Jade, history: "wandering for 3 years trying to figured out". Should be "figure out".
Jade, legend: "they tortured and killed her fours sons". Should be "four".

Jaden, history: The last paragraph is a repeat and can be deleted.

"Mary (Teni aka truckinnhors)" should be "truckinnhorsin"

Myra: "left at the alter". Should be "altar".
Myra: "Mildar has dealt with her one more". Should be "on".

Perhaps a lurker who's always wanted to play with us...

Your invitation is very tempting. Maybe next time when I have more time available.

[Microwave0ven]

curious about this:

Dracubius - "Evil, Sadistic, Julius, frankly mean..." what's "julius"? is it supposed to be 'jealous'? Also, the capitalization here could be changed (ie. Sadistic -> sadistic)


---------
Mildar
"Anaged supernatural" should be "An aged supernatural"
"potions some times with" should be "potions sometimes with"
"If you come to his door be prepared to answer 3 questions." insert comma after "door"
"If you get them right he will reward you. If you get them wrong he will punish you." insert comma after "right" and "wrong"

[Ruby]

Thanks everyone for the great comments and corrections.

Warning - I've also heard that there are some funky characters showing depending on the browser you are using.

This is a cry for help to Super MO/Jaden - If you have time, may you please copy the source code and make these corrections. If you don't have the time, just let me know and I'll put it back on my to do list.

Everyone else - keep those edits and suggestions coming. I won't be able to get to them for a few days and a more eyeballs won't hurt.

[Ruby]

Pretty Golden Slave Sari - great posts today - it's nice to have you back.

Jade - I just love how you keep these stories going.

Jaden - Cool dream - so real. A sweet interlude and reality check to the workings of the mind after a harsh session with two mistresses and a master. Poor baby thought you were going to get a nice fun spanking instead of a hard lesson. Behave yourself and I'll be happy to give you a fun spanking on our cruise.

Lord Mobius - I'll be missing you as I sail off with Captain Chuck. Thanks for the kind words on the bio FAQ.

BabySub - Have fun with Yuri. I'd say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know virtual Ruby is a slut and there's not much she wouldn't do with the big guy.

[BabySub]

BabySub - Have fun with Yuri. I'd say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know virtual Ruby is a slut and there's not much she wouldn't do with the big guy.

LMFAO! Very true. I do intend to have fun. Lots of it. I've posted the beginning, but don't have time or the strength to do anything more with it tonight. I'll certainly have some sweet dreams though.

The bios page is looking awesome btw, and I will, at some time this year, get a bio done for BabySub. Maybe. lol.

[Ruby]

B - another amazing journey into your fantasies. Excellent story posts today, without giving away the plot - let's just way I'd be happy to have Yuri take me where he's going to take you, anytime. :-)

[Microwave0ven]

Warning - I've also heard that there are some funky characters showing depending on the browser you are using.

This is a cry for help to Super MO/Jaden - If you have time, may you please copy the source code and make these corrections. If you don't have the time, just let me know and I'll put it back on my to do list.

Yep, with Mozilla Firefox i get some odd characters..and yep, i can fix the page for you

edit: fixed and emailed off to you, will update further fixes as they get discovered and "reported"

Do we really need a Spell Nazi in the dungeon.

This is suppose to be a free and easy writing exorcise. It is suppose to be fun. enough of the critiques K

yessir, not tryin to criticize you in particular, just correcting what chromedome11 missed and also, when i think "julius" i think of that Orange Julius food chain..

[Ruby]

Thanks Jaden for taking the time to fix! Big hugs and extra kisses and cuddles when you wake from your virtual dream.

Everyone - the new page is up:

http://www.vampirespet.com/FAQMDCB.html

[Myya]

Hey, just checking in real fast. love what's happening in the dungeon . not much time to really sit down and write lately though.

If my mistress deems me worthy enough please feel free to take me along with you on the cruise I'll try to make some time to stop by and write a bit.

*waves as she runs off*

[Ruby]

Hey, just checking in real fast. love what's happening in the dungeon . not much time to really sit down and write lately though.

If my mistress deems me worthy enough please feel free to take me along with you on the cruise I'll try to make some time to stop by and write a bit.

*waves as she runs off*

Oh, yes, pretty pet, you are now coming and will be. He He....:-)

--- FYI ---

My hubby, Master T, granted me permission to put up one of my GLAM photos as my avatar. Unlike Dorian Grey, I have aged a bit since this was taken. But in the dungeon, I'm forever 29 and holding. LOL

Darkgirl, Jade and Kat - thanks for inspiring me to be brave enough to use the new avatar.

[Mobius]

curious about this:

Dracubius - "Evil, Sadistic, Julius, frankly mean..." what's "julius"? is it supposed to be 'jealous'? Also, the capitalization here could be changed (ie. Sadistic -> sadistic)


---------
Mildar
"Anaged supernatural" should be "An aged supernatural"
"potions some times with" should be "potions sometimes with"
"If you come to his door be prepared to answer 3 questions." insert comma after "door"
"If you get them right he will reward you. If you get them wrong he will punish you." insert comma after "right" and "wrong"

Do we really need a Spell Nazi in the dungeon.

This is suppose to be a free and easy writing exorcise. It is suppose to be fun.
enough of the critiques K