Mmmm, what a pleasant opening.

The way you introduce your characters is elegant. Not too much information, just enough to give us an idea and tickle our curiousity. The mysterious young man has his secrets, and Ms Kawdin and her private goons are clearly up to no good.

With the 'Take him to the back room' you have created one of those delightful F/m/m moments where the female character, lazy, merely gives orders and watches obedient male minions with defenceless male prey. I find this very hot. (Psst... try to act surprised. )

Atmosphere, tension, action... Thank you, M0!