The whole key to a good BDSM or D/s relationship, as in any successful relationship, is communication, trust and respect.
If you have not talked to Her about all the things you are writing then you need to start. You might wish to peruse a site together or read a book togehter and then discuss it.
One of the most common mistakes a Dom can make is feel that they hav eto have all the answers, they must plan everything, and the sub needs for them to be told everything.
You two need to talk, alot. Before scening, during, if appropriate, and for sure, after. Then talk some more. Then some more, and I think you are getting the picture.
I have been in this lifestyle for over 10 years, with my submissive for 6 and I clearly don't know everything there is to know. I learn something here most everytime I come on. I ask questions of others, and my submissive and just go at my own speed.

Trust- obviously a key component and one you already have a bit in that she is letting you tie her up. But don't be afraid to discuss things and ask if you can try this or that before going ahead and doing it. Especially if it is something going beyond a limit you may have previously had.

Respect- Too many novice Doms think that a sub is nothing because she or him chooses to be submissive. Be respectful of each other and your choices and you two will grow together.

Also, if she seems to be demanding more than you can safely give her, SLOW DOWN. Stop if you have to and talk. NEVER do something you aren't sure of, even if the sub says it will be fine. That is howmost accidents and injuries happen.

If you get to the point you feel comfortable with each other and can go public so to speak, try to attend a BDSM Conference. Then are several all around the country and Canada of various sizes. They are a wealth of information, but mostly a chance to see others doing what you love to participate in.

Let me know what SPECIFIC things I vcan help you with, either in this forum or through email.

One thing you do need to tlak about right away is kinky sex versus Dominance/submission.



SirW