When it comes to the children its quite simple to avoid them having any knowledge of your lifestyle if your careful. When children are in the room you can even play a little by just covering up on couch together with a blanket. If thats to close for comfort for you as long as their old enough to be left alone for a second my wife(sub) and I use the excuse that one of us is getting a shower than the other one waits a minute and syas they have to go to bathroom. You cant leave them alone to long but it does give you a little time.