The difference is really immense -- controlling and 'domming' (in lack of a better term) behaviour are two entirely different pairs of shoes. I'm quite aware of the difference due to personal experience...but it's more an emotional thing and I couldn't have put it so eloquently. So thanks a lot for that -- it's very encouraging to read these things now and then.

Another difference is that control freaks change the rules of the game without finding it necessary to tell you -- I think that is why it is so impossible to please them. If a dom finds it necessary to change the rules you are the first to know. I must have read half a million pages on the subject, but it really suffices to say there is a BIG difference -- and the more people are aware of it, the better.