First of all, thank you for the happy birthday I received from you.

The questions you ask,for some maybe a simple answer. I am, lets just say 40ish, and have been married for 17 years. "Vanilla" sex holds no excitment. But trying to figure out where you want to be is another whole story. I have a good job that I have a lot of control over a lot of people, but would like, no maybe the word for it is "need" to let someone else take control every so often. My husband would be more than happy to let me take control of our sex life or take control himself. He is up for anything as long as sex is involved. As far as submission, I think maybe the idea of it has more appeal to me the actually submitting. So some of us out here are just looking to change.