(*note* limit - I can't ingest any foreign substance that isn't food or cum)

I looked at him for a minute while holding the razor in one hand and the shaving cream in the other and I seriously thought about snapping that safety razor in half, but those blades are so thin it would be like giving him a paper cut. Not terribly effective. So I grabbed a clean washrag draped over a sink and soaked in warm water, then laid on my back on the ground with the pillow beneath my butt. This raised my hips above my ribs, making it easier to see and therefore shave my most private parts.
I had some qualms about spreading my legs and showing him my pussy, but I figured he'd already seen it all and I really had nothing to lose at this point anyways, so I spread my legs as wide as I could and used the warm washcloth to soften the skin around my neatly trimmed bush.
Next I smoothed the thick shaving cream on my pussy and began shaving away the hair, using the washcloth to wipe off the blade and keep it clean. It didn't take long - my pubic hair has always been relatively sparse.
I then dutifully smeared some shaving cream around my asshole and carefully ran the razor across the delicate skin. By the time I was done, I was as bald as a newborn baby down there, and I have to say, I rather liked the feeling. At least there was an upside to all of this, however miniscule it may be.

When I was finished, I rinsed the razor and the wash cloth off in the sink, used the washcloth to wipe any remaining shaving cream and loose hairs from my privates, then stood in front of him with my legs spread for inspection. All without being asked, of course. I figured if I was compliant, he might relax his security enough for me to slip through. If I was lucky.