Thank you, Kate- I will check out that link!

Sir_G, I appreciate you vouching for Sir_Russell's knowledge. (It's not that I doubted, particularly given the accolades, but 3rd party praise is always a good thing in my book.) I hope I didn't sound glib in my post where I repeated back what I was reading- that was not my intention at all. I wanted to make sure that I understood what was said and that I wasn't missing any important points.

I don't have a problem with my husband leaving marks (I probably want them more than he wants to leave them, though I don't presume to make that call for certain), so it is 100% consentual. I don't know how sane we are, but I don't think I'm aiming for anything that would get us locked up. So my primary concern with all of this is to make sure we are being as safe as possible- and it's not listed first (in SSC) for nothing!

I know you said to let him know where I'm at with my pain threshold as best as I can, and phrased it that way for a reason, but I do have to say that your reasoning is valid here- My pain threshold changes enormously when I hit just the right spot in subspace, and if he doesn't do something that will jostle me right out of it, I sometimes barely feel things that would have me begging him to stop when I'm not in that space.

I wonder if that's unusual? To have such a drastic change from my normal responses in subspace, I mean- I know there's a noticable change, but... well, I suppose that varies from person to person.

Thank you all again for the responses. Sir_G, I am definately taking your advice to heart! (Especially the having fun part!)