How do I assert my position?

[GreyJack]

I also have to add my agreement with the other assessements. One of the major red flags is that nowhere does it appear that this other Dom has mentioned how his current couple partner thinks or feels about the play. That right there (as well as his other comments) says to you "I don't respect subs." Bottom line, he does not deserve to play with you online or in r/l. Along with what others have said here, that's enough said for you to make a firm decision: no play or contact with this type of person.

[cadence]

Thanks for your replies. I do see the red flags, and I am uncomfortable with this whole situation. I definately do not want to meet and would not put myself in a postition where I am uncomfortable.

I am just confused as to why he is being so arrogant. I have known him for at least two years. He has brought up the fact, only once, that he would like to be able to train me. I had told him no. It was never discussed again.
We have remained friends and talk occasionally.

I know that he and his submissive like play with other submissives, so I thought that it would be okay.
I was confused as to whether or not he could call the shots because I was the one who had asked them to set up a possible play date.
I had assumed that we would first meet and discuss in person what was expected.

I am confused as to why I am being pushed into it. I can understand that he should be able to say what he wants to do as well, but that should be discussed first.

While I am aware that he is pushy right now, I wasn't entirely sure as to how much control he could have with this situation. Unless he thinks that I am easily swayed because I am not more assertive when I talk to him.