Quote Originally Posted by bunkerchief
I quoted Schoppenhauer because of his extreme view and to start a debate. Obviously it was a lot more provocative and blood boiling than I had in mind because it started anything but a debate. Misogyny is also probably a bad term to use as it has so many gender political connotations.

However, I will carry on using the term misogyny and hope people take a step back a little before answering as to not use it would lead into so many diviations and clarifications. It is widely held in many intellectual circles that misogyny is an inate trait in a male's make up. That is not to say a male is a misogynist per se but when a male denies having any trait of misogyny in him I would challenge him. It's rather like when someone says 'I'm not a racist' when they have been socialised into an inherently racist society. What they mean to say is, I don't believe in racism. However, no matter that they have intellectually rejected racism, it doesn't mean to say they have stopped all subconscious racist thought or actions.

Males aren't aroused by liking women but by wanting them. It is the nature of the beast. (OK my belief).That is not to say men will automatically act on the impulse of wanting a particular woman but the cue is subconsciously there. A man can and would for the most part, given the opportunity, engage sexually with a woman on a clothes line if possible. (evolutionary theory) He has to spread himself around to make sure he at least inpregnates one female so his genes carry on. (As the saying goes, it takes a wiseman to know his father). In many cases his behaviour would be modified by socialisation and indoctrinated moral standards.

Women or so I'm informed, while they might feel aroused by the sight of a particular male, prefer to feel safe, secure and comfortable before engaging in sexual activity. After all (going back to evolutionary theory), she is making the bigger investment than the male because she could get pregnant. She would also want the male for protection and providing (getting more irrelevent in modern society because this provision is provided by the group i.e society). The need and the strategy of the woman is then at odds with the male and vice versa. At least subconsciously if not intellectually or so the theory goes.

Which comes back to my original question: are the sexes destined to misunderstand and miscommunicate with each other or when miscommunication happens is it a conventient excuse used by one or the other?
OK, I'm not a philosophy "follower", for want of a better way to put it. I do believe though, that there is truth to be followed in your question.

Men and women think differently, this has been proven time and again, not just sexually, but in everything the two separate sexes do. Our mental make up is different, and as a result we are going to miscommunicate to one another.

That's not to say we shouldn't make an effort to reach beyond those communication problems, but when we don't, that is when we have the miscues that create problems between the sexes.

I too am speaking from a bad relationship experience that still reaches of the many years since it took place. Communication or lack there of, and even misunderstanding the information being presented was the bulk of the problem in that relationship, among other things, but if the communication had been more direct I believe the outcome may have been different even if the relationship still ultimately didn't survive.

BTW: This is my 2 cents worth and to tell you the truth I felt inferior mental making it.