Thanks Nikita. That at least gives me some ideas as to how to go about making some improvements. I'll probably try again tomorrow and see what I can come up with.

Rose, please just make sure you are working from my most recent draft for the nits and any other suggestions you might come up with. By the time you get to it, I'll have had three posted here at least, two so far, and the one I'll do sometime tomorrow. With all of the work I will have put into this by the time its done, I hope it will be something I am genuinely proud of. I'm not there yet with this piece, but I'll get there.