i agree with the other ladies here.... it is abuse. Maybe not physical abuse but the worse you can ever get... mental.
I have been in this situation as some might know already as my stories are on this site somewhere. both in a nilla relationship and also in the lifestyle. even now I still some some relapse... depends on what the triggers are.

I dont know whereabout in England you are but im in the Midlands, so if you ever want to contact me for a ear to bend then please feel free to PM me anytime.

good luck

cg