I have been where you are. It isn't easy, but sometimes it has to be done. Don't beat yourself up for making a "mistake". Sometimes relationships just don't work out. If you had a 5-month vanilla relationship that you decided to end, it wouldn't be a "mistake"... it would just be a relationship that didn't work out.

Everything is a learning experience. If you didn't have your time with this man, you may never have come to the realizations about what you really need.

In my situation I was seeing a Dom who was in the same town as me, but worked literally around the clock. I was really sick and tired of planning to see him, and then him going to work instead. It wasn't his fault... he was like that before I met him, and it really wasn't fair for me to expect him to change. But he had taught me a few things in the process, and I don't regret anything. One day I just told him the truth (over the phone, since I rarely ever saw him). I said I needed someone that had more time for me, and who I could build a real relationship with. He understood, but also understood he couldn't give it to me. We stayed friends for a little while, but eventually drifted apart.

I really wanted to find someone who could give me everything. I wanted all of the benefits of a "regular" relationship, and a Dom too. I was lucky to find it shortly after breaking off the previous relationship. We now own a house together, and are expecting a baby. So you absolutely deserve, and can have, everything you want.

I strongly believe that every day you stay in a relationship that is wrong for you, is one day that you are missing out on being with someone who is right.

It won't be easy, but it sounds like it is something you have to do. Good luck!