Interesting read. There were a couple of things I might change, the most glaring of which is "took a header". There was also one spot where, believe it or not, I would have added an "and". The last comment, for now, is that I would have liked to have a more ominous ending. Otherwise, I was rather fond of this tale.

I will probably read this again in the next day or two so I can offer a proper blow to your ego. Though, truth be told, at first glance I really can't see where my destruction would begin. Such a disappointment!