I like it. Full-on butt fucking is painful for me, but I like the humiliation aspect of it. But what really feels good is when my man is giving me cunnilingus and he does "the shocker." He folds down his ring finger, inserts his first two fingers in my vagina, and plays with my butt with his pinky. At first he would just press at the opening, then insert a tiny bit and pull back out. It was so minor, and all the good sensations were so powerful, that there was no discomfort at all. Now he can slide his pinky in right away, and I think it feels fabulous. I haven't noticed any lasting looseness down there.

I also think (and he does, too--you should definitely let your BF try some of this backdoor action for himself, as men are even more sensitive there than women!) that anal beads are awesome! You can have as much or as little penetration as you want, and feel a lot less of the fullness that comes with something as thick as a cock or dildo.

As for safety: use lots of lube and don't do anything that hurts a lot; you could get hurt if you're not careful. But also remember that bigger things pass through your backside than a finger. Also, don't go back and forth willy-nilly between anal and vaginal penetration. The germs from your butt can give you a urinary tract infection.

Good luck!