Hi Putnamcocpl,

I have to agree with Tojo and Ruby. Communication is very important. Nothing tells your sub that you care for her more than asking her what she liked, what would she do again, what turned her off and what would she like to try. A checklist is always a good idea. Not only does it give you a place to start from but gives you both ideas of where you would like to go with this and almost more importantly where you don't.

If it helps, my Master and I use a rating system of 1 to 10, 10 being the best of the best. When we first started he got me to rate everything we did until we had built up our trust to where now we only do it when we try something new or if he was concerned about my reaction during a session.

I know it is so exciting when you first discover this lifestyle that you want to do everything right away but just being aware that you are afraid of rushing her into things too quickly is a good step in the right direction.

Trust is so important to the D/s relationship and even more so as you tread towards S/m. Talking with your sub will help you develop a trust and a bond that will allow the two of you to happily travel together into this new adventure.

Good luck and have fun,

eviana